Top Ten Lists… Truer to Life

TOP TEN THINGS TO SAY TO PEOPLE AT HOMECOMING

10. What do you do? Where do you work? Can I get a job there as well?

9.  What ever happened to the girl that you used to hang out that had the banging body?  Ya’ll weren’t close, were you?

8.  Yooo!  On the reals I know you don’t remember me but I used to be on the guest list back in the day…. You could still hook me up, right?

7.  Sorry I can’t talk right now I’m late for class!  Hey look over there it’s Michael Jackson! [pointing in arbitrary direction -trying to get away from people I don’t like]

6.  Yo!  For real though I should have just stayed with you and we’d be married by now.  [to like 10 different girls]

5.  No for real that isn’t me…  I say no to drugs, for real.  I smell it strong here too, but for real I don’t know where it’s coming from for real. [Waves hand all around]

4.  Damn she used to be fine and now she’s not so fine… at all… I wonder what happened?

3.  Damn she was never this fine before or else I would have talked to her!

2.  Go Bison Go!

1.  Homey, I miss you and all but are you going to pass that?

 

TOP TEN MOVIES TO HELP WHITE PEOPLE UNDERSTAND BLACK PEOPLE

10. ‘ROOTS’ – Alex Haley’s autobiography in a miniseries.
9. ‘HOOP DREAMS’ – A documentary of two youths with high aspirations.
8. ‘BLUE COLLAR’ – Richard Pryor as a Detroit factory auto worker.
7. ‘DO THE RIGHT THING’ – Spike Lee spins this story of morality in Brooklyn.
6. ‘WHEN WE WERE KINGS’ – Mohammed Ali vs. George Foreman in Zaire, 1974.
5. ‘A SOLDIERS STORY’ – Charles Fuller’s play adapted to screen with Harold Rollins.
4. ‘EYES ON THE PRIZE’ – This is probably the definitive documentary on civil rights.
3. ‘ONCE UPON A TIME… WHEN WE WERE COLORED’ – A great adaptation.
2. ‘SCHOOL DAZE’ – Spike Lee represents faggot ass Morehouse with a Black College classic.
1. ‘BAMBOOZLED’ – Wow, that makes three Spike films! This one is a masterpiece.

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